There was a 5 rand admission charge to see the cheetahs. I told my aunt I didn’t have any cash, and she responded that nieces don’t need cash unless they’re on their own. The ticket lady immediately jumped in with a cheerful, “you don’t need money when you have an auntie! That’s what aunties are for!”
It was a relatively mundane exchange, I guess, but let me break down the dynamics of that interaction to show its significance and what it means to me. I’m studying abroad in South Africa and my (white, Irish) aunt is visiting me for the week. In South Africa I’m considered “coloured”, in the States I’ve been considered lots of things, but for the sake of simplicity I’ll just say I’m mixed. The woman who was selling tickets at the cheetah reserve was a coloured, or perhaps a lighter-skinned black, South African.
The quickness of her reaction and her immediate acceptance of the fact that I could have a white aunt is what took me by surprise, and upon further consideration I realized that it might have been the first time in my life that a stranger unquestioningly acknowledged that a white person could be related to me. That might sound weird, but I think it’s true. Growing up in the US nobody ever doubted that I was my mom’s daughter, she’s significantly darker than I am, but people say we look alike. On the other hand, nowadays when I go anywhere with my dad, people assume I’m his girlfriend or wife before they’ll believe I’m his daughter; it seems to be hard for people to understand that a white man could have a non-white daughter. It’s silly because people of different “races” have been mixing literally forever, but at least for the past 300 years, all over the world.
Being in South Africa is so cool for exactly that reason. There’s an entire “racial” identity called “coloured” for people who aren’t “black” or “white” and whose ancestors usually come from some combination of the Khoisan people of South Africa, Bantu-speaking Africans, White Afrikaaners with Dutch ancestry who colonized South Africa, British people who also colonized South Africa, Portuguese people who were another colonial power, Malay people who were brought to South Africa from Dutch colonies as slaves, and Indians and south Asians who were brought by the British as indentured servants. The idea of having a category for these people is unique to South Africa because of its history, but it’s also the only place I’ve been to that accepts mixedness or multiraciality as a legitimate identity.
While the South African system is by no means flawless, it feels so much nicer to have the complexities and nuances of your identity acknowledged, as opposed to the situation in the States where only now are people beginning to realize that it’s possible to have ancestors from lots of places and to identify racially and culturally with more than one group.
3 comments:
hey so I was responding then I changed my mind and turned it into a post :) But I dont like it when it says "0 comments" so I'm putting this here instead :)
Actually nevermind. I divided it up, so here's my comment:
YES, Sian!!!
I was SO waiting to hear that (below) from you because I was hoping you'd react positively to SA because of the "coloured" identity and the way it acknowledges a mixed people as being their own independent group, rather than being "half" or part of a bigger category that doesn't necessarily apply to them . So I'm happy you're happy. I think there's a lot of reasons that the coloured identity is unique to South Africa, but at the same time the reason I'm talking like I know exactly how you feel (even thought I haven't been to South Africa yet - world cup 2010 here i come) is because prior to living in the U.S., when I was in Cote d'Ivoire, I was "metis" (as in Rwanda as well for my whole life) which isn't so much of a legitimate historical category as it is in SA, but it was something that people everywhere recognized and understood as being a sociocultural category. And so, unlike this weekend when I went to the movies with my Dad, people did NOT assume that I was his goldigger wife or girlfriend, or that we weren't together at all. And I think it's the same way in many parts of Africa, and it was the same way in Nairobi, simply because (unfortunately) the colonial legacy brought many people from many places / "races" together, and therefore its an accepted fact that mixed people exist. The dynamic just changes according to the country you're in. For example, the "Swahili", a cultural group (not the language) are a HUGE group in Kenya, and they are nationally recognized as being mixed kenyan/south asian or arab. They are a predominantly muslim community, but they are also all Kenyans. But in general, an acceptance of mixed people is very common across Africa, and it was something I grew up with.
This is also the reason, I think, that a) it's so hard for me to deal with race issues in America, and b) I kept on getting into fights with Dwight in our SD group, and c) why I started this blog (kind of) because I think being mixed IS an identity of its own. Because I grew up believing that, I don't think I will ever accept being labeled as being anything else, and I will always argue to defend my own (and peoples like me/us) identity against any classification that doesn't overtly recognized that I am mixed. Like when people label me as "black" in the US or when I need to check a box. It also bothers me when people label me as American for the same reason, because I am not exclusively American and I hate how ppl think its okay to let one identity overshadow another.
So today someone called my aunt "mommy" to me, as in that he assumed she was my mom.
Which kind of introduced the gender dynamic to this whole thing, because I think its easier to see women as mothers or something.
I dont know what I'm saying, but I think theres something in the way men and women experience identity, and we should think/talk about it at some point. thats all.
:)
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